Wednesday, January 28, 2015

pace

Every day is a journey and the journey itself is home ~ M. Basho




Pace:
noun
Consistent and continuous speed in walking running or moving



Rather than a resolution, which I have long been dedicated to, I have set out to traverse this year with a mere word, a theme I suppose or an awareness.  Last year my theme was a phrase and it centered around mindful creative exploration; and I believe it kept me focused in making some courageous choices in the arena of my career/creative path. 



Pace

It is like stillness – seeing beyond the hustle – seeing through closed or blinded eyes to the path that invites slow movement, consistent movement, real natural movement or pause.  Pace, the flow from movement to pause, and from pause to movement, everything in between.



Pace

This year I have set out to pace myself, to move forward or stay still with intention.  I made big changes in my work life during the second part of last year, changes focused on setting free the need to be constantly occupied, a decades long habit of filling every crevice of my time with something.  



Pace

I wanted to learn the value of now.  Mindfulness.  And I wanted to learn the value of me without appropriating it from task or title…


Pace

I finally mustered the courage to do what I had long known to be necessary; to give it all up, to start at zero, to learn to choose with intention rather than need; clamoring need generated by a clamoring urge to prove myself.

I had known this as truth somewhere in the recesses of my mind for years; but scared to death, of what I may find on the other side, I had not been able to let go.



Pace

And then finally I started, and at last one by one it all started to go.  And as each thing fell away I felt myself begin to grapple for new things to fill the crevices, and for the first time I was able to resist.

And where I had believed there would be empty holes, I began to find more of me, and I began to feel full.




Pace

So this year I have set out to pace myself. To maintain the commitment to not being over committed.  To be present, alert, mindful, intentional in what I choose to do.

I want to be part of the process, alert to discover the creative potential in each day.


It is like stillness – seeing beyond the hustle – seeing through closed or blinded eyes to the path that invites slow movement, consistent movement, real natural movement or pause.  Pace, the flow from movement to pause, and from pause to movement, everything in between.


With gratitude,
Joanna




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